7The sick man answered Him, “Sir, I have no man to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up; but while I am coming, another steps down before me.” 8Jesus said to him, “Rise, take up your bed and walk.” 9And immediately the man was made well, took up his bed, and walked. And that day was the Sabbath. 10The Jews therefore said to him who was cured, “It is the Sabbath; it is not lawful for you to carry your bed.” John 5: 7-8 (NKJV)
When you read this story of a man who was found sitting near the pool of Bethesda for thirty-eight years, you get to wonder, ‘How much patience could one have? How much faith could a person encompass?’ As I read through the story again, many things come to mind and many questions pop into my head. For thirty-eight years this man sat on his mat, near the pool and watched people being lowered into the pool and healed. He watched people get their healing, blind people seeing, maybe crippled people walking. He watched all of that and did not give up on the hope that one day someone will also lower him down and he will begin to walk again.
Unfortunately, this is how life is. Life is not fair like war and love they say. Life does not happen for all of us equally. Someone may seem to be cruising in life while you are suffering. Your journey is not another’s. Well, I want to ask you a question, what happens when things do not go your way? What heart posture do you have when you are crippled and have no control over the situations in your life? How do you feel when you see other people getting their blessing, tangible and intangible yet your life seems stagnant? What if you don’t have friends or a community to help you reach the ‘pool’ to access your blessing? What then?
Sometimes we are alone in the valley and there is no one to help us out of it. In such cases, we need to stand strong in faith and trust that one day God will pass by and say take up your mat and go. I cannot imagine the amount of torment the paralyzed man must have gone through in the 38 years. I am sure he felt alone, deserted, unworthy depressed, and anxious. Sometimes I’m sure he had lost hope but then he remembered his goal was to be healed and that one day that healing would come. This has taught me so much about how in life we will never get things in our own time. Unless God wants, then things will never always be our way.
In times of loneliness, times of inadequacy, remember why you started. I have asked myself the same question many times, ‘Why did I start this PhD? Why am I here? Is there even hope? Is there even a point that I am so stubborn that I too will succeed? Why do I see people having A or B and I don’t?’ But I am always reminded that one day the grace of God will locate me and when it does, I will use my mat as a testimony that God is good. I will use whatever held me down to show that God has never, even in my valleys, left me or forsaken me.
Stay steadfast in prayer, as you lay on your mat crippled with no hope. Remember that greater is the same Spirit that raised Jesus from the dead is in you now. You too will rise again. You too will get that job, you will get that admission, you will have trustworthy friends, you will reach your goals and tick everything on your vision board. Jesus will come to you as you lay at the gate waiting for assistance to the pool and when He does, testify that He is good, because He is.
One day too soon, you will carry your folded mat in your hands and walk again. You will get that degree, and be free from mental health slavery, suicidal thoughts, inadequacy, and idols. And lastly… you will find your purpose…
You are worthy and loved.
I love you…
Nthabeleng
Journey of a thousand miles🙏 