Destiny attachment

Scrolling through social media a few weeks ago, I came across an interesting topic that Miss Universe –  Zozibini Tunzi briefly tapped into – destiny attachment. Of course, I had to find out what it really meant and how it has had an effect on me, directly or indirectly.  At one point in my life, I had thought maybe I loved certain people, but in hind sight I was afraid of what was to happen if I left them in that season, hence I continued with the relationships – attachment issues.  People always advise me to travel across the continent or globally – sole travel. But I have a fear of leaving my comfortable home, Southern Africa. Questions always flood my mind and I get overwhelmed by the change that can happen if I left what I knew and dared to venture into the unknown.

An old culture that was practised by the Greeks shows that the greatest misery is brought by attachment. Being attached to people, places and patterns bring nothing but comfort. But what if your purpose will be better in a different place or with different people or with new habits? What if you will unleash your full potential by being accustomed to change and the ability to adapt? As difficult as it may be, sometimes we need to just leave certain individuals at some point in our lives for ourselves to evolve. We may also need to leave a certain version of ourselves in some places to become better people.

We hurt ourselves and bring ourselves so much disappointment by looking for happiness in places that have hurt us. In places that have not let us grow, in places that have continually shown us that their season is over in our lives. But because we hold on so tightly to them and make them our idols then, we end up sad or bitter when we don’t get the results we expected. Imagine being in a mud pit and expecting to be clean and attractive but always returning to the pit that tainted you.

It is not always about being in negative situations. Growth only means being able to have a different mindset and results as you had before. If you are attached to places and people who don’t water this into you then your growth will be stagnant. On the contrary, please get attached to your principles, yes people may add and try to distort those but you are you because of what you stand for. Get attached to your dreams, work as hard for your dreams as you think about  them. Get attached to your mission and your vision and don’t let anyone change that for you. Only you know your purpose on this earth and don’t let the noise distract you.

A very interesting story in the bible in Genesis 19 talks about a man, Lot, who was spared by the Lord from a city that was filled with wickedness and sin and because of that sin that was happening in Gomorrah, He decided to destroy the city. However, He asked Lot to take his family to a new destiny, his sons, daughters and sons-in-law through angels that He sent into Lot’s presence. The other family members resisted and thought he was joking so he fled with a few of his family members including his wife. In verse 26 it writes; ‘But Lot’s wife looked back, and she became a pillar of salt.’ Lot’s wife knew what they were leaving and understood why they had to leave. But, because she was so attached to where she was from, the people, the lifestyle maybe even the comfortability, she had to look back but this led to her distraction.

‘Beware of destiny addiction. The idea that happiness is in the next person, the next job or the next partner. Until you give up the idea that happiness is somewhere else, it will never be where you are.’ – Natalie Manuel Lee

If like me you are afraid of change, believe me, it does not bring any growth and it just inhibits meeting new amazing people and making new amazing memories.

Only be attached to things that make you grow – listen to God’s voice within you and soar.

Love

Nthabeleng Hlapisi